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Match Report
 

Sat 12th June

Garforth PC A (1) v Saxton A (5)

Saxton A won by 14 runs
Saxton A 203/9
Garforth PC A 189/8

 

The Saxton team arrived at jagged intervals to the sunlit Garforth arena at an earlier agreed time of 1:00pm, with the arrival of Bob Hills uncharacteristically late and he also later took his uncharacteristical stroll around the ground. The crippled Tysonsator allowing member of the twin towers, Tom Dennison, to integrate into the 2nd X1.

Dave and Nige clearly had their sixth senses tuned, aware that England would be its usual shambles at the world cup, and consequently they were in no hurry to watch England get laughed at, unbeaten with 12 on the board after 12 overs. Yet, the rate soon picked up when the Young Gaffer took to the crease, smashing the bowlers to all parts of the ground. Meanwhile, the Buckmeister was forced to depart after a controversial decision from umpire Bob, height being the main factor, nevertheless Dave did pick up his fifty and it came with his typical tremendous strike rate. Donald momentarily appeared at the crease with fond memories of last year in his orange head, yet he walked immediately for a golden quack. Ian cracked a speedy 50 but many players failed, “when we are 120 - 2 off 25 overs, 300 is the minimum target” optimistic, but arguably our total should have been at least 40 – 50 runs greater!  A typical Saxton collapse followed and Thomas Liam Nesbitt or Pottsy to those who know him best, was called upon to see off the last over, despite a scare giving the keeper catching practice, this was managed and the Saxton innings ended on a respectable 203 - 9.

Tea was a more than entertaining affair, the raspberry cream cakes and buttered scones were a devious ploy by Garforth to slow down the Saxton fielding team and many fell into their trap. Meanwhile, Ian had found out that Fletcher had broken his beloved thighpad which he had treasured by his bedside table for more than a decade. Some choice language followed and Harry was forced to face the captains wrath and will undoubtedly receive the highest fine of the season – just checked it out and thigh pads are pretty expensive Fletch, good luck with that.

Onto bowling (notice fielding is mysteriously left out) and their opener rode his luck to make his way to a big score and keep Garforth very much in the game. Once he left due to a superb catch from Jamie sprinting round the boundary, there was a late cameo performance from the Garforth number 6, however Saxton managed to scrape through with 20 odd runs to spare. Although, there was some interesting umpiring from Garforth, some more interesting language and even more interesting to see their umpire refuse to give anything, with Dave’s enchanting moustache bristling in his face. The match could have been concluded in time to witness the finale of the Argentina game if the second team didn’t contain at least 5 Robert Green’s. Yet, who cares? It’s a win and a richly deserved win. Speaking of riches, the fines have spiked sharply upwards, and I for one am forced into employment to cover the damages.

Darius Vassell’s fan club.

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